Alternative Families A Look At The Samesex — страница 3
Families Prosper There are basic requirements for all families with children, although alternative groups will have a select number more prerequisites. Firstly, the needs of the child in gay and lesbian families will need to be met, allowing him or her to develop his/her own identity and healthy levels of self-esteem. Balancing a healthy social life for the child with both gay, lesbian, and traditional families and supporting the child’s identity formation when associated in cross-gender play activities. And lastly, participating in activities and providing resources that provide continuous cultural sensitization. Barriers to the family growth Unlike heterosexual parents and their children, however, lesbian and gay parents and their children are often subject to prejudice because of sexual orientation that turns judges, legislators, professionals, and the public against them, frequently resulting in negative outcomes such as loss of physical custody, restrictions on visitation, and prohibitions against adoption. The current legal standing of homosexual parents seeking custody of their children remains precarious. Courts determine custody and visitation on the basis of the ‘best interests of the child.’ Current judicial rulings reflect a bias against awarding custody or granting visitation rights to homosexual parents, favoring the heterosexual parent or heterosexual relative of the child(ren). (Allen, M. & Burrell, N. 1994) This issue however, must be examined morally and not politically. The child should be the most important factor in the adoption process. So this cannot be an issue of gay rights, it must instead be looked at as who will provide a better home for the child. Placing a child in a position where he or she will be removed from a loving home can be traumatizing. Parenting Skills among hetero and homosexual families The gay rights movement of the 1970s has led to more gay parents who are “out” or public about their sexual orientation. More gay and lesbian parents want to be honest and open about their orientation so that their children can form positive self-concepts and value difference in others. (Koerner, M. & Hulsebosch, P. 1996). “Parenting skills of homosexual and heterosexual parents tend to be similar on most measures, including general attitudes about parenting (Mucklow & Phelan, 1979),and a variety of back ground variables . Parents also scored alike on measures of self-concept and responses to child behavior. Lesbian and heterosexual mothers scored alike on measures of maternal attitudes and parent effectiveness .Both groups also equally emphasized the value of social support from friends and family . Children from these families were also quite similar to children from heterosexual homes. These children scored alike on measures of moral maturity, intelligence, locus of control, family and peer relationships, adjustment to single parent family life and self-concept .These categories are commonly used by researchers to assess overall adjustment. Contrary to some of the societal beliefs reviewed earlier, these children also scored alike on measures of sexual identity and gender role preferences. Counselors should be aware of these similarities. They indicate that having a homosexual parent does not completely redefine the meaning of family.(Kramer, L. 1997) Issues facing Same-sex Families Society Views & Stereotyping There are many homophobic individuals in today’s society who are the main cause of negative stereotypes against lesbians and gay parents. These negative stereotypes often prove to be irrational and falsified, revealing that gay and lesbian parents could be equally as fit as traditional parents. 1)”The accusation that majority of gay men are child molesters has been rejected in that the overwhelming majority of child sexual abusers area heterosexual men, who abuse both boys and girls”(Kramer, L.1997) 2)The fear that children of lesbian and gay parents will become lesbian or gay is irrational in that studies show that the sexual orientation of the parents has no effect whatsoever on sexual orientation of youths. “Examined the sexual orientation of 82 adult sons of 55 gay men. Found that more than 90% of the sons whose sexual orientation could be rated were heterosexual. Gay and heterosexual sons did not differ on potentially relevant variables such as length of time they had lived with their fathers.”(Bailey, J. 1995) 3)The concern that the children of gay and lesbian headed families will not develop so called appropriate gender identity or gender behavior has been introduced. This was proved incorrect in that when comparing children of gay parents to children of
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